What is it with smoke alarms? Have you ever known one to have a flat battery during the day? Our one decided that 3 am was the best time to let us know it was feeling a bit unwell. Cursing smoke alarm designers for the on-board clock function, I tried to ignore it but it's chirrup was too persistent, but only until I turned the light on to try to fix it. Then it stopped.
Thinking a truce had been declared, I turned the light off again only for the chirruping to start up again. Cursing smoke alarm designers for both the on-board clock and the light-deactivation function, I gave in and set off to the garage to get
the ladder. In the kitchen I met our two cats as they set off on their own hunt for the chirruping source. They moved past me like a couple of Messerschmitts let loose over the English Channel, long sleek killing machines hugging the ground, moving in a lithe, sinewy formation. I considered leaving them to it but then realised that even they'd have problems getting to it without the step ladder.
Now I don't have a good track record with ladders. I haven't fallen off one (yet) but I have managed to wave my junk at the neighbours after a gutter cleaning mission went horribly wrong. As I climbed the ladder, I stood on the end of my sarong, it unfurled and the rest, as they say, is a public nuisance charge. It was embarrassing at the time but we can all laugh about it now, in fact the arresting officer and the magistrate still seem to find it hilarious, and I'm sure, once the neighbour's wife has finished her trauma counselling, she'll see the funny side too.
Once I'd set the ladder up and checked the area for any possible witnesses (complainants, I think they called them last time) I managed to get the smoke alarm down for a closer inspection. I took the old battery out and searched unsuccessfully through cupboards for a new one. Ever the optimist, I decided to put the old one back in and pray. Nope, chirrup, chirrup. Oh well, I'll just take the battery out and get a new one later. Chirrup, chirrup. No way, no battery and it's still going?
Cursing smoke alarm designers for the on-board clock, the light-deactivation and the chirrup-without-a-battery functions, I threw it in the back of my car and went back to bed. I couldn't get back to sleep though, I was too worried that the smoke alarm designers had added a self-destruct-if-thrown-in-the-back-of-a-car function. Can anyone smell something burning?
Curse the battery manufacturers for being part of the conspiracy. A mate of mine awoke at 3am to the chirrupping as you did, only he promised to change the battery when it was daylight. He forgot about it initially and began tuning out to the sound. Four years later and it is still chirrupping away...
ReplyDeleteHe'd probably miss the noise now, wouldn't be able to sleep without it.
Delete